The Ghost of Christmas Past What’s always coming at the same time every year? Christmas! And if you grew up in a dysfunctional family, navigating the Christmas season can feel complicated. The build-up creates expectations of a warm, joyful, and loving time with family. An idealized version of the holiday that seems to be a...
Navigating Rupture & Repair The world in 2024 is fast. There is never enough time. Relationship breakdown can be swift, instantly blocked or ghosted. Or a slow, drawn out, breakdown with much pain. Either way its tempting to avoid conflict rather than confront it. Conflict can feel scary, or outside your control. However it’s...
Anticipatory Anxiety Stress is a normal necessary part of life. You can’t find your car keys, get stuck in traffic, or wait for an important call or text. Will cause some stress but usually manageable and will easily decline. If you are going through ‘something’ (e.g divorce, redundancy, bereavement etc) stress levels will...
The Pain of Parentification As a child, you were growing up too soon if you experienced: Being the peacekeeper and mediating conflict with adults around you Raising siblings Keeping the entire house clean, doing the washing, cooking, ironing, shopping “Stepping up” to take the place of an absent parent Keeping dangerous secrets for a loved...
Anxiety feels horrible. It can be mentally and physically all consuming. You may not want to show others your anxiety, so you desperately try to hide your feelings or shut them down. Brave face it – which can feel even worse. So an obvious solution would be to avoid situations that cause you to feel...
What to Expect It may have been months, it may have been years. But on average it can take up to 12 months for someone to eventually see a counsellor. It is a big deal, and even after all these years I don’t take it lightly when people get in touch with me. So...
What is an accredited counsellor? If you’ve been considering counselling you may have come across all kinds of terms and abbreviations. We don’t make it all that easy to understand, to be honest counselling can sound confusing. Between the qualifications and ‘modes’ (styles of counselling) even down to whether we call ourselves a counsellor, therapist...
How to feel better about yourself Self-esteem can be high or low – or somewhere in the middle. It sort of sounds a bit like a thermostat. With feeling warm and toasty or cold and gloomy. But what is self-esteem? Basically, it’s a fundamental aspect of your mental well-being. It shapes the way you...
The best Christmas gift Christmas is a whirlwind. All the planning, preparing, shopping, wrapping, decorating – adding financial and family pressure. There is so much to do; it just doesn’t happen by magic. You have to do it all. Focusing on materialistic traditions, finding the best Christmas gifts, sorting the food, and organising the...
And why positive thinking is so powerful Thoughts are like a domino effect, where one can topple the next. It sets the stage for a cascade of emotions and actions. It’s fascinating. How a single thought, whether negative or positive, can initiate a chain reaction. Simultaneously influencing your mindset and emotions in profound ways, which...